TABLE OF CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION: Not Your Father’s Fatherhood
PART I: PREGNANCY, THE MANDATORY WAITING PERIOD
CHAPTER 1: THE FIRST TRIMESTER
READY OR NOT: Finding Out and What Comes After
MOODY BLUES: You vs. Your Wife’s Hormones
THE DOCTOR FROM ANOTHER ERA: Is Your OB OK?
ABSTINENCE EDUCATION: Everything’s Off-limits for Her – What About You?
HELL IS OTHER PEOPLE: The Unfortunate Necessity of Coming Out as an Expectant Dad
CHAPTER 2: THE SECOND TRIMESTER
THE APPELLATION TRAIL: Naming Names
LET’S GET PHILOSOPHICAL: What Makes a Good Parent?
IN THE BEDROOM: What About Sex?
THE ULTRASOUND AND THE FURY: The Rigors of Prenatal Testing
CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?: Getting to Know Your Fetus
CHAPTER 3: THE THIRD TRIMESTER
PRIDE AND PREGNANCY: How Much Help is Too Much?
SHOWER POWER: The Joy of Getting
WHAT YOU NEED: Stuff
PARENTING PREP: Taking Classes
D-DAY: The Delivery
PART II: HEY, THIS IS DIFFERENT: THE TRANSITION
CHAPTER 4: NUCLEAR TESTING: How Dad, Mom and Baby Find a Rhythm as a New Family
THREE IS A MAGIC NUMBER: Meet Your New Roommate
THE ART OF WAR: Arguing in Front of a Baby
BOY WONDER: Which Parent is the Sidekick?
NURSING A GRUDGE: Breastfeeding –– With or Without You
EXIT SANDMAN: Sleep Deprivation and You
VISITING HOURS: The Pros and Cons of Postpartum Houseguests
OFF THE CHARTS: Milestone Madness
PART III: PEOPLE ARE STRANGE (WHEN YOU’RE A FATHER
CHAPTER 5: YOU’RE ALWAYS A CHILD TO THEM
THE SPOILERS: Grandparents Determined to Do Things Their Way
IT WAS GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU
MEANS NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOUR SORRY: The Ups and Downs of Fibbing to Your Family
NOT-SO-GRANDPARENTS
LONG-DISTANCE GRANDPARENTING
YOU CAN’T GO HOME AGAIN: A Family-Gathering Survival Guide
CHAPTER 6: FRIENDS –– THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY
TRIAL BY DIAPER: Old Friends Put to the Test
THE OLD PROS: Friends with Kids
MARRIED FATHER SEEKS SAME FOR PLAYDATES, HAND-ME-DOWNS: Making New
Parent-Friends
BOB AND CAROL AND TED AND ALICE AND THEIR KIDS: Family Dating
CHAPTER 7: WHO ARE THE PEOPLE IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD?
PLAYDATE POLITICS: Should I Stay or Should I Go?
IT’S MY PARTY AND I’LL BUY IF I WANT TO
HOSTILE ENCOUNTERS: What is Wrong with These People?
PART IV: THE (RUG)RAT RACE: WORK & HOME
CHAPTER 8: MEN AT WORK
WORKING DADS NEED LOVE, TOO
HOW I LEARNED TO STOP WORRYING AND LOVE THE DOUBLE-STANDARD
CHAPTER 9: HOMEWARD BOUND
SO WHAT DO YOU DO ALL DAY?
RETURN OF THE MOTHER
CHAPTER 10: IN THE COMPANY OF MEN
MIX & MATCH: Dads Group Open Admissions
HY DO WE ALL JUST GET ALONG?
NOTHING BUT NET: Dads on the Web
CHAPTER 11: SOMEONE TO WATCH OVER THEM
ON YOUR TURF
ON THEIR TURF
PART V: WORLDS COLLIDE
CHAPTER 12: EXTREME MAKOVER HOME EDITION
PARENTING THROUGH ART DIRECTION: Setting the Scene for the Perfect Child
THE SAFETY DANCE
CHAPTER 13: FASHION FAUX PA
THE UNITED COLORS OF FATHERHOOD: Your Style Meets Daddy Style
THE BJöRN IDENTITY: Being a Kangaroo Dad
THE WHEEL MAN
THE BAG MAN
CHAPTER 14: SYMPATHY FOR THE DEVIL: CHILDREN’S TELEVISION
THE HIGH-DEFINITION SKELETON IN THE CLOSET
THE OPIATE OF THE MASSES: The Zombification Effect
IT’S AN AD, AD, AD, AD WORLD: The Insidious Evil of Commercials
MASTERS OF OUR DOMAIN: Watching with Your Child
ADULT ENTERTAINMENT: Your Child, Homer, and You
CHAPTER 15: SONG SUNG BLUES
ROCK YOUR BABY: Kid-Friendly Grown-up Music
CROSSOVER APPEAL: Grown-up-Friendly Kids’ Music
CHAPTER 16: A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS
LITERATURE THROUGH THE AGES: Reading to Infants vs. Reading to Toddlers
ABANDONED BY OPRAH: Good Book? Bad Book?
CHAPTER 17: DADS IN TOYLAND
THE RISE OF THE MACHINES: Wishing the Batteries Weren’t Included
PLAYS NICE WITH OTHERS: Man Meets Toy
CONTROLLER ISSUES: The Video Gaming Father
PART VI: THE PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS
CHAPTER 18: STEPPING OUT WITH MY BABY
MEET MR. PIZZA-FACE: Dining Out
DINNER AND A MOVIE?
HAVE BABY –– WILL TRAVEL
CHAPTER 19: LEISURE REHAB
24-MINUTE PARTY PEOPLE: Too Much, Too Soon
TOO BUSY TO GET BUSY: Finding Sex Again